It’s Ok. A Few Thoughts On My 25th Birthday

Today is my 25th birthday.

And to be honest, I’ve been dreading this day for awhile.

At 25, I thought my life would look a lot differently. There are things I thought I would have figured out by now, boxes I would have checked, professional achievements I would have made.

A few weeks ago I came across a post on tumblr that read, “It’s ok that you’re not who you thought you’d be.” And I immediately burst into tears.

Because sometimes, we just need someone to say that it’s ok. It’s ok to cry, it’s ok to laugh, it’s ok to be disappointed, it’s ok to feel however you’re feeling.

I realized that my anxieties about turning 25 were rooted in nothing but a number. Just because certain things haven’t happened yet, doesn’t mean you’ve failed, and it doesn’t mean they won’t happen either. It just means that you’re living. And that looks different for everyone.

Middle school, high school, and college Skylar had crafted a picture of what 25 was supposed to look like based on the milestones in other people’s lives. But I had been discounting all of the incredible, trying, and beautiful things that have happened in my 25 years of life.

So let this be a reminder (and trust me I need to hear this on a regular basis) that it’s ok that your life doesn’t look the way you thought it would. Or the way that someone else thinks it should.

It’s ok.



  • I think it’s always important to realize that you can’t hold yourself to standard you created for yourself when you were younger and didn’t know as much as you do now. I think that you’re an incredibly smart and capable person and you should be very proud of all you’ve accomplished so far! Happy birthday!!

    • Skylar Allen

      Thank you so much Deborah! Knowing what I know now, there’s no way that the goals I set when I was younger could even be slightly realistic.